‘A thousand years wouldn’t be long enough for me not to meet with Baron von Dennis again. He thinks he’s just so witty, it makes my vest crawl into my pants. That Baron is about as funny as a turtle farting. I wouldn’t say he insulted me, but he made others laugh in a way I couldn’t understand. There’s no room for humour in a world where Satan roams free. The Baron should be banished to Timbukto with a hoard of female demons and a Jimmy Saville ‘Fix It’ badge.’

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